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Adventures In Stupidity (Part 3)
WWE = Weak Wrestling Emulation
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Ever think that WWE is punishment for being a wrestling fan and only having basic cable?

If you really, really, think that WWE is good in any sense of the word, then you're sorrily....horribly....incredibly....wrong. Of course, I mean no real offense to you since the WWE seems to have brainwashed people into thinking that their wrestling is....well.....wrestling. They have some incredible talent on their roster and they're all being HORRIBLY WASTED AND THEIR CAREERS ARE GOING DOWN THE DRAIN FOR MONEY. Vincent Kennedy MacMahon can suck my motherfucking dick and love it because he's the lethal poison in the world of wrestling. He's simply cornering the market like any gang or hell's angels would do with zero respect at all for what the product really means to people.

When I do happen to watch WWE wrestling, I'm usually overtly-disgusted with the way the matches go and the way the talent's treated for the most part. Ultimo Dragon is hugely wasted along with Rey Mysterio Jr. Like, what kind of a fucking finisher is the 619 anyways (and yes I know he sometimes follows it up with the West Coast Pop)? The 619 was originally just a luchador way of reversing an irish whip or faking a tope suicida to get your opponent to duck or whatever, then you'd do a tope onto them or just stay in the ring. Since when did it ever become a kick?

I've heard that they're going as far as considering banning the belly-to-belly suplex, this is the last straw for me for banning moves. This is why I watch more Japanese and NWA wrestling, they actually WRESTLE and perform interesting moves with great accuracy.

Do you know WHY Vince bans moves? Like, 2 people get injured from a move for any length of time and a move will be banned because Vince isn't in this for the wrestling, he's in this for the money since he's cornered the market on talent (note how I never said he cornered the market on wrestling). All he does is drop a couple of names and the humongous crowd of complete idiots flocks to the event. People don't ever say "Yeah, I saw the Rock versus Brock match, what incredible wrestling in that one", it's more like "Yeah, I freakin' got to see the Rock (or Brock) live, totally awesome, I was in the 500,000th row in a flat balcony but I was right there!"

If you want to see some actual wrestling, then watch matches like the 6-man deathmatch between WING and FMW, Amazing Red vs. Low-ki in Ring Of Honor, even just the triple threat match between Chris Sabin, Frank Kazarian, and Michael Shane in NWA TNA. These matches incorporate WRESTLING and pretty much ONLY WRESTLING. These leagues are FAR superior to WWE in a million ways except for net profit and size of the fanbase.

In Japan, you'd never see some complete idiot holding some crappy sign that took him a week to think up something like "Y2Jackass". You'd see a crowd who actually appreciates wrestling for what it is, it's a spectacle of athleticism, not of who has the biggest pyro or who's the funniest. People have actually said to me "You know what? Hayabusa would rock in the WWE." and I feel like ripping their intestines out and attaching them to their penises so they really can just go fuck themselves for once. Putting Hayabusa in the WWE would be the greatest disgrace next to Tiger Mask (if he were still around) going into it. I'm glad I don't turn onto RAW or Smackdown and see one of my more respected athletes on there.

I used to think that Taka Michinoku was a joke when I first saw him and Sho Funaki appear in WWF (as it was at that point). Then I saw the japanese match between Hayabusa and Taka where Taka WINS with a Michinoku driver (the way the move's supposed to be done). During the match, there's a spot involving 13 chairs and a 180 moonsault tope suicida from Hayabusa, WWE ain't got shit on Taka.

If you still aren't convinced then you've obviously got no real concept of wrestling and therefore are not a real fan of WRESTLING. You can just go back to listening to Jim Ross horribly fuck up the names of every single move done in one week and never learn about WRESTLING.